my mum: “I watch the movie “The Pretty Girl” (Pretty Woman) every night, I’m always happy that they stay together at the end, they dated such a long time.”

my mum: “Why didn’t you tell me you got married?”
me: “Well, I’ve been married for 31 years mum.”
my mum: “I would remember that, if that were true.”
me: “Oh, well, I’ve been really busy, I forgot to mention it.”

me: “Why is your garbage can out mum?”
my mum: “Because it’s Friday and that’s when the garbage people come.”
me: “Today is Thursday, mum.”
my mum: “Today is Friday, Sylvia”
me after pausing and realizing she’s 100 percent correct: “Yes, today is Friday mum, you’re right.”
my mum: “I’m always right.”

on our way to the store, my mum: “Who sings this song?”
me: “Johnny Cash”
my mum: “Is he still alive?”
me: “No, he’s not.”
my mum: “Oh, that makes me so sad”.

on our way home from the store, my mum: “Who sings this song?”
me: “Johnny Cash”
my mum: “Is he still alive?”
me: “Yes, he’s alive.”
my mum: “I wonder what he’s doing right now?”
me: “I wonder too.”