Tag Archives: writing

My thoughts in the middle of the night

photo by Sylvia

i think of the lantern flies hibernating in the winter
(their beauty and their destructiveness)

i think about the sculptural tree fungus
(some fungus is good and some is harmful)

i grieve the space dog, Laika
(why, why, why did they have to send her into space?)

my lost heart locket haunts me, 50 years later
(if i bought another, would it heal the longing?)

maybe some tea would be good right now
(lemon ginger or peppermint?)

instagram.com/wolfnevemama/

Language: a short version and/or a long version

color study/Sylvia

the short version:

the language of my ancestors melts into the canvas of my life, drips onto the pavement of the past and splashes, sticky and viscous into the shortened walkway of the future 

the long version:

When I was a child, I knew and understood one language. This language was not on television and it was not overheard on the streets of my small 1970’s Ohio city. It was not spoken at school and as a consequence I struggled both academically and socially. Placed into a remedial class for “slow learners”, my learning curve, steeped and rocky and barbed. 

This language that I spoke at home became a home in and of itself, a home filled with pungent smells and passionate voices. 

The significance of my first language is heavy and dense. It has the weight of pride and beauty, of romance and memory, it has the aura of history and time and place. Like a dark, impending wave from a tumultuous sea, this language also crests menacingly, sulfurous and suffocating.

Several things can be true at the same time. A revelation. 

I chose a path away from my culture, away from my language. For the most part, I have no regrets. Still, as time moves forward, the language of my ancestors melts into the canvas of my life, drips onto the pavement of the past and splashes, sticky and viscous into the shortened walkway of the future.

There will come a time when I have no one in which to share this language. The final shedding of a skin that exposes the raw sorrow of having run so far and so long and having advanced such a tiny distance. 

What then?